Mon 8 Sep 2008
Rita Talks:The Pursuit of Happiness (An Open Journal)
Posted by Rita under *Rita Talks

Everywhere I look I see people who are geniunely unhappy in their lives. Of course, we are all unhappy at certain points in our lives, but there are those who are chronically unhappy and have been for years. Unhappiness is a condition that we do not have to remain in. We can take control of our lives and sometimes it’s as simple as being very honest with ourselves. I read somewhere that we can find our way by asking the following questions:
- What would it take for me to be perfectly happy? Write down everything you can think that you would need to be happy as far as health, loving relationships, home, car, clothes, money, travel, etc. Let your mind run free. Pretend there are no limits. Find out what you need to be happy.
- What has been holding you back? Be perfectly honest with yourself here no matter how painful. Write down what situations,and with whom, you are not perfectly happy. Knowing is half the battle. Once you have determined what is the cause of your unhappiness, then write the steps needed to change it.
- When were you happiest? Who were you with, and what were you doing?
Now you simply need to look over the answers to your questions and design an action plan to bring you closer to the life that you dream of. Some things you may be able to change immediately, while others may take a bit more time. The important thing is to build an action plan and get started on that journey.
Not surprisingly, I have been thinking of ways to bring more happiness into my own life. Especially in the area of cultivating more friendships, and I have followed my own advice. I have acted on a plan to offer a free beginner’s crochet class to my FreeCycle group in order to meet some new people. Wish me luck! (Of course, I probably should have charged for the class and that would have killed two birds with one stone. I would have made more money AND met some new people. *laughs* But I didn’t think that would go over very well in a FreeCycle group.)
Incidentally, I lost 2 pounds in the past week!
Have a great week, and be sure to leave some comments about some changes you plan to make to ensure your own happiness.
Rita



September 14th, 2008 at 2:39 pm
Hi Rita: Interesting that there are no responses to this, yet there were so many, unusually looong ones to the lipstick on a pig post!
I’ve learned from my coaching training, from working with many women (& some men)& from my own personal internal diaglogue, that most of us do not believe we have the right to be completely blissful.
I’ve been working on this a long time personally, & by george, I believe I’m getting there. So here’s my list:
* I will continue to follow my heart & my soul & do what feels right EVERY MOMENT OF EVERY DAY
* I will continue working towards my goals (if I don’t have goals I’m unhappy) by:
* writing for midlife women
* working with women in the English speaking world in-person & by phone
* studying TESL so I can teach Tibetan nuns in McLeod Ganj India each year and
* keeping on releasing my old, limiting, stressful beliefs, thoughts & feelings by self-monitoring & peer monitoring & continuing to receive energy work.
Warm regards
Ellen
http://www.ellenbesso.com/midlifemaze
September 15th, 2008 at 7:52 pm
Ellen,
I agree with you. It seems that most people do not feel they are worthy of happiness. They say they want to be happy, but then there seems to be a lot of self sabotaging going on.
I enjoyed reading your goals to increase your happiness. Thanks for sharing!
Rita